The low, light and lemon child Thaha! Fandom: Twilight Saga
TITLE TRILOGY : Despair & Desire TITLE PART ONE
: Becoming Enemies charas : Schm-Um, Bella, Cullens (especially Jasper, Carlisle, Rosalie), Leah, Denali, Volturi (especially Caius), & a few OCs
DISCLAIMER: Everything from the books already and its film adaptation is not known to me and you you can be sure that I will say something of this kind never voluntarily (uh, because my soul pure as I could lie & ndash , and so). The OC is one of my dear Erin Tress (Estrelles), which was kind enough to lend it to me \u0026lt;3 For my purposes, not for her. Weave is so selfless and unselfish \u0026lt;3 CLAIMS
: My fantasy is mine, my confused thoughts are my (albeit influenced from outside, is clear), and anything that looks like a bad joke , is also mine. Hands off!
WARNINGS: AU, Lemon (for, um, experts are more likely Lime), violence, cages, Chara Death, f-slash OTHER: There are many variations / Vera ; changes to Canon. The charas are called the same, look the same, etc., but these 'werewolves versus vampires \u0026lt; Thing as not quite as furry as the Canon.
+ Despair & Desire I
: BECOMING
ENEMIES S. +
Prolog.
evil Girls.
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PoV: Bella.
Good girls go to heaven.
Always wear high-necked tops, long skirts or pants without impact, learn to associate the biblical psalms from the covenants is an ambitious Student, a dutiful daughter, love and honor your parents.
Jesus be with you. More you need not .
Last night Jesus came to me.
And he knows full well I am far from being a good girl.
no longer.
May never have been.
Still, he brought me salvation. Sweet and bitter, trembling, tingling on my skin, the flesh ecstasy. For Jesus is a fallen. displaced from the light, a paradise of outcasts. The glistening bright lights of a simulated halo only at first glance across the dirt that clings to a depraved mind.
None of us is pure.
still holding , Jesus whispered, with an angelic voice in my ear. His hands pushed me up the Rock, his golden hair fell over his forehead damp. Behind him, Edward, another Fallen. Beautiful as the glow of the heavenly sky must be impure as the fire after the request in his blackened eyes.
My hell.
My salvation.
Pale, anxious prancing candlelight appeared dim shadow in the vault. I felt more than that I saw. Edward circled me warily, each movement graceful and incredibly precise. He stopped behind me, grabbed me by the hand, I moved on to the bed. The crimson silk cover pleasantly rubbed my naked thigh, Jesus followed my movement and pressed closer to me. In a perfect appearance, he reared up over me, his body, hard, cold, ready for anything, took his place between my spread Legs.
Do it , I croaked hoarsely.
Do it. I want it.
Much ...
Much ...
Jesus smiled. Agonizingly slowly, he tilted his head, ran his index finger hair from my neck. His lips touched my skin caressed them. With the tip of the tongue, he went to my carotid artery, just below my jaw, and back again.
Do it now, Carlisle , I heard Edward whisper eagerly.
In the name of the Father.
of the son.
The Holy Spirit ...
I let out a piercing scream, than Jesus' catches were reflected in my neck. It felt as if my flesh would be torn to pieces, and at the same uncontrollable excitement crept through my body. A few seconds later I took the first signs of what I have longed for change: On the spot began at Jesus' power in my veins overflowing, spread of fire, hot, painful, like burning coals .
Enjoy It , Edward said to me.
sorrow for me.
And so I lie here, I am in bed writhing and screaming in eternal torment translucent while the tortured soul of dirt from the body. Vaguely I take my visitors was Edward, who holds my hand and words that I can not understand, whispers in my ear, Jesus, who breathed me kisses on the forehead, Alice, caressing my skin burning .
Yes, I enjoy it.
Enjoy the pain is so intense that I will probably never recover from it. Enjoy the knowledge, now totally unprotected and delivered to be naked on a huge bed, surrounded by thirsty vampires. Enjoy the idea soon to already be mistress of the night.
Bad girls know the real sky is bathed in pulsating pain.
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+
Despair & Desire I:
BECOMING
ENEMIES S.
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Chapter One.
Eternal control.
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PoV: Bella.
Do you know the feeling on your skin of steel, steel, which closes around your wrist and you caught on iron chains to a rough wall hold? If not, it gets to know and love you in it. to know the control of me is always the only was that gave me security. Protection. Power. You to give to others, voluntarily surrender myself was unthinkable. Isabella Swan had to submit to no one.
Thank God I've been left behind.
in the underground vault is heard no sound. My lungs are hungry not for oxygen, my joints are not stiff when I move for hours to an inch. Like a statue, I am here chained to my master waiting. We soon midnight, Happy Hour at Crimson Shadow . How stupid lambs are the people pushing the club, ready to be slaughtered to be, eager to play for us Bluthure. Hard to believe that I myself was once a lamb. Weak. Pathetic. found
Until my therapist for my unhealthy behavior and everything has changed.
>>> >>
It was a dreary afternoon in April when I took all my courage together and decided that my flatmate Leah, I was still a ordinary student of my semester was to address. She had just returned from a lecture to our room and had no welcoming me earlier, flung her bag packed in a corner and the length thrown on her bed. Before I learned who Leah is really - sorry: what Leah - I held it for strange. Arrogant, smug, sometimes even dangerous. We had absolutely nothing in common, never a word to each other and went as often as possible from the path. At night, when I went to sleep, seemed to only really begin to Leah the day, once it got dark, she opened the carefully locked closet, pulled it out a baggy, heavy-looking shoulder bag and disappeared. Mostly I heard they did not come back, sometimes they even came again when I already got up again.
Er, Leah? "Cautiously, I approached her bed and cleared my throat. "I would like to ask you for advice."
Leah groaned annoyed and tired and sluggish blinked in my direction. "Where is the problem, Swan? Do you miss about your Mommy again? "
bitch, I thought to myself. "No, it's about ... Would you please put up at least when I talk to you?"
"Madame and her claims ever & hellip , "with an exaggerated groan of exhaustion was directed to Leah in her bed and swung her long legs over the edge so hard that I zurücktorkeln only just and could prevent, on Kniehö ; he attacked be. "So? How can I help, Swan? "
" Yes, well, hm, "I hemmed and hawed, as without a cowardly chicken feathers. Oh, hell, why I just graced me so much? Leah could not do anything except laugh at me, perhaps. tell my concern to the entire campus around was clearly not her thing. To this end it was too much a loner. "Okay," I ventured to a new trial, "I had lunch today about an appointment with my therapist."
Aha. How interesting . "
Did I already mention that I hate Leah even then not even the death was? Today she is my arch-enemy. That which is one of the few mortals to be able to wipe out my existence. Too bad for her pretty face, that we come to it before. Let's see if they will keep their big mouth when she has to watch the daisies down in growing.
"Anyway," I went on to control efforts, "she thinks, my urge to always and everywhere to be in control WAE, re forced and could have a negative impact on my development. "
Leah grinned mischievously. "Smart woman. But what's this have to do with me ? "
should try
"To fight I consciously control our audit. Not bleeding, initially on an experimental basis in certain situations. to dominate instead, should I let dominate . "I sighed deeply and looked out the window. The drizzle had grown from just more, the sky was cloudy so strong that the illusion arose, we had midnight. It was just after I felt the sun and heat, I would have cursed the weather but can manipulate at will. "The problem is I have no idea how to do that. My therapist would certainly have been suggestions, but ... "
" ... that would have given you the feeling that it has control over your life, "concluded Leah.
I nodded. "Exactly. I thought I would even get the brilliant idea, but my head is empty as blown. In what situation could I dominated bitteschön be, if it is not just about a relationship going? "
" sex. "
Hm , jaa ... What? "
" Do not be so chaste, Swan looked at. "Leah me with appraising eyes. "What is sex, you should know even . Man and woman, man and man, woman and woman, just like that one best for you. Nudity, arousal, "
»
Okay, "I interrupted her with emphasis. "Hell, I know exactly what is sex." But not yet, damn how can it be exhilarating to have some. No wonder, were limited to my experiences until finally the day has little excitatory vanilla sex with a guy named Mike Newton, who is generally too soon and will then know whether he was good.
"In my opinion, sex is ideal to your little disturbance" to provide relief, "said Leah. They had already bored again. Supple she slipped from her bed, was fishing for her bag and dug out from a crumpled piece of paper. "Here. Whom you can call if needed quiet. He appreciates every little bit of attention. "
skeptical, I took the paper to me. In spidery writing a mobile phone number was listed, including The name Jasper Whitlock . "Who is that?"
"Does it really matter? He is, to some extent at least, about your age, looks great and requires no farewell kitsch dripping vows of love. If you are looking for something non-binding, Jasper is just your husband, "
" What do you mean, in some way? "
Leah reached up with his index finger and thumb just to the nose, then shook his head warping. "Well, in terms of his experience, he seems older than he is. And now listen to me to have as stupid questions. You have what you wanted, so let me back in peace. "
What I did more than happy. The labels in the closed hand, I grabbed a light rain jacket and slipped out of our way too tiny room. In the corridors is a bustle of students, most of them were soaking wet up to leave hair because they were rushed from the seminars without an umbrella on the campus of the houses. As I continued moving toward the exit, I wondered if one of the students was Jasper Whitlock around me. I was also probably met him already? I liked the idea not to arrange a meeting with a familiar face - if I would actually decide to call Jasper. The thought of just having sex with a stranger would
the therapy for me, seemed quite absurd. Of course I was aware that dominance was also in terms of pillow talk a theme, a weighty top of that, but I submit naked, with no sleeves? Granted, I imagine it, let my knees tremble.
When I reached the open, I knew not what to do next. I pulled the hood of my rain jacket over his head and took refuge at the edge of a covered outdoor hall. In an inside pocket of the jacket and handed me my phone was like a silent encouragement uncomfortable against the sternum. A short call, what harm could it matter? The best thing I found out just once, if I was ever this Jasper sympathetic enough to go with him to shoulder. Sometimes a brief conversation and analysis of a voice from above, in order to get a reasonably accurate first impression. So I fumbled for my phone and typed a number.
The number of my mother, to be exact.
"Bella!" she squealed after the thirteenth ringing in the line. "What's New? How are you? How is it going to study? Pour it with you too down with rain? Did you-"
" Hi, Mom, "I interrupted her. Call a lack of planning first and foremost the mother, so I was then. Leah was not so wrong with the fact that I was strongly of Renée. Despite all still cling to it. "What you're doing?"
"Oh, just the bracket work. Because Phil "
» Where is the iron? "
As might be expected, was heard in the next second, a shrill scream, followed by hasty trampling and suppressed curses. Then the line was interrupted. Typical. Just as typical as my nagging indecision. The thing was, I I never have time ill or felt like, that I, and only I
, I was saying, in my world for granted. With a mother who did not even know how she put the SIM card into her mobile phone and a once-a-year one-week-father without the smallest bit of kitchen skills, I was from a young adult in the real the family. Instead of that Renée would have missed house arrest, it was rather that I aufgebrummt every few weeks because of a her childish stupidity a penalty. When she finally got to Phil, her current partner know, I have the opportunity with both hands grabbed me and universities
far away
promoted by Arizona.
My phone started vibrating in my hand and Renée's number flashed on the screen. I hesitated a moment, then I pushed it away, and hastily typed Jaspers number before I could think about it but my mother or otherwise, or start a second call attempt. Silently, I prayed, Jasper would be currently employed elsewhere and would not answer my call, but then it clicked in the line and a dark, velvety voice rang out.
"Uh, hi," I stammered, "I am speaking with Jasper?"
» ; Mhm. ?. Who's there "
Bella Swan, Leah's friend ..." An immoderate exaggeration, but I thought> friend \u0026lt; would make me appear as a confidential> unwanted roommate \u0026lt;.
Jasper silent for so long that I almost believed he would have strangled me. But then he cleared his throat several times and I saw virtually in front of me, as he awakens from a wet daydream with Leah. "Leah, okay. What can I do for you? "
deep breath. And again.
It cost me all my will, this strange man on the phone about my problem, I tell at the time not yet considered as such, always and again I wandered off from the real issue and even found myself in how I dropped a few meaningless phrases about the weather. Jasper listened patiently to my lecture, thought they are probably to be babble of a madman. I was more surprised than he, no sooner was I come to the end, time and place was called and hung up with a 'see you later'. Holy shit. Since I was now staring into the rain out, and tried to understand that I had just arranged to meet someone for the purpose of therapeutic measures for sex.
As much as I am today ashamed to have to admit: When I was finally released from my horror mortis, I ran back without detours Leah and handed me over to her hands. One I have to leave her, she has her damn thing done well.
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PoV: Sammy.
I feel like it's moving in me. This thing. No matter what I do - whether I on the ceiling above me rigid, I toss and turn restlessly in the narrow bed, or close my eyes and desperately trying to sleep, and perhaps least in my dreams without the thing to be - I see it always before me, as it would have been with claws and teeth a way out of my body spellbound, staring at me with glowing red eyes.
What will never be the case.
For if the thing is leaving my body, it will tear up everything and thereby recklessly destroy. The thing is life and not about scissors, miserable because of him that I die, croak, perish.
Everything okay?
asks me Leah, the woman who got me out of hell and brought her here. She sits on the very edge of my bed, and the fact that her face is rigid with anger, I know how you thought it in the ass appears to have made me such a shit stupid question. I can save me express my answer, we both know how it is.
if everything is okay ? Shit, damn , a parasite in my body entrenched, and wants my blood, my God-damned, worthless soul
! And I am the mother of this thing, it's my child , and I can only think over and over: If I could, I would be up from my body and TEAR Rip up, you face the bloody newborn TEAR OF SKULL.
I laugh shrilly.
you do it , exclaims to me then; followed by sobs. I grab for Leah's hand, squeeze it and fixed her dark full of supplication, so tired eyes. suffocate me with a pillow. Jag me a shot in the head. Do something. Please. Anything is better than ... than this. Kill me, and then kill the thing.
Samantha travels, Leah at me harshly, and her hand from me. If my body is not swollen like a dead sperm whale, covered with blue, green, black Spots, the ribs a splinter sea, Leah would throw himself on me and that shit ausprügeln. I wish they did, wish they would stop to pull themselves together, and the huge amounts of suppressed dark feelings in this way you can finally run free. Despair. Anger. Hatred. I would be in their place long since gone crazy and become completely crazy went off with a steak knife on the other girls in this house, we all die, die, burn
, all together, hell, purgatory -
-if I could, I would slaughter us all without hesitation.
No hope, no escape. Agony and eternity and fall and fall.
Stop with the shit! yells at me Leah. She jumps on her feet, it staggers backwards against a dresser. I see Donna wakes up in bed next to me about it, and instinctively holds with both hands, the belly, but Leah noticed anything about it.
You have a couple of weeks ago, when do not like you are already in the ground and rot! Weeks, damn it! Until then, we might have a solution, found a way and
the floor above us heard a whimper, soon to be a much more melodic children crying from it. The look on Leah's face changed abruptly, and the guiding concern of mother love in her eyes, is me kotzübel. For Donna and me - and all the other girls, who are already kicked the bucket in front of us for such a monster, and those who will follow - these brats, so beautiful and fascinating and acting innocent they may be, nothing but shells of death and destruction and the devil and sin. In this house there are blood-lust demons that look like children. Every time I hear them, or get to face, I see next to the illusion of my own demon faces of dead girls and young women before me, the lifeless eyes staring at me and ask how they could just be so stupid, so careless. Die because they wanted to get it right concerned, shit on the abyss, shit on the whispered words of others who call it perversion, perversion. Die, because, once you have tried from sin, not away from it came. It does not even try.
ask the mothers of the dead demons, as they had so far can come. And ask why I just stupid
been am.
>>>>>
I was very young 17 years old, a waiter wanted as an actress make the big breakthrough, at home, the drunken mother was an actress before myself, but no dramas or sitcoms about young people, cheap porn without any action on their side, or on and in it, some guy, or two or three more guys, I did not even know exactly, in any case all together just as they drank at least, my tip at the diner bad, reasonably acceptable and if I accidentally while serving what was on the floor and I bent down
me that I am in at the pott ugly Bieder Fummel Pistachio unchecked could stare at the string.
Not too bad when I omitting the string. Also accidentally, of course.
The days were long, and at the same time is not long enough, and if I after a double layer came home and my Mum with my mouth open sleeping in the chair found on the box themselves, only younger, slimmer, and a naked tail editing, I sometimes asked me whether I was on the way to to follow in their footsteps. Whether I had made a huge mistake when I threw the High School for the benefit of my career. But maybe if I'd rather have the conclusion to try and do to be accepted at a college far, far away.
But I had real talent. I thought.
Then one day this sat to die for gorgeous young guy in the diner and ordered the Frass disgusting that we spent as superduperdollleckeres day special, he is ultimately just as little touched as the black coffee. As he sat in the seat niche, I felt his gaze rest on me, and I bent down and stretched me, fiddled around with my apron splattered me with intent to chest level to excessive passion on the spot rumzuwischen. I imagined we press it down on his table and me from the other guests waitresses and fuck out of his mind was of my own daydreams so hot that I could not help as my break is preferable to include me in one of the toilet cubicles for women, where I impatiently the hem of my ugly Bander and tore up my hand in her panties let disappear. It was not good, not satisfactory, although rather because I had come almost before I had even touched me just right, and what I wanted - This man his tail. Deep in me. - Had to be real and not merely imagined.
It was as if he had fallen into my head and I personally would
planted the desire to be fucked by him.
In retrospect, would I say that this is actually quite possible.
better than the thought alone bear the blame, with 17 being nothing but a dying incubator.
was
When I looked a little cold water injected into the heated face, washed my hands and stepped back into the main area of the dinner, the stranger was already gone. I went to my work as usual, although I am regularly the desire came over me astride to sit on the next best type, and ended up as my shift and I was shivering in the night, he was again as opposed to a power pole, looked at me directly. He stood before me, said he would be Edward, I said, hey, I'm Sammy, and then he took me to the Crimson Shadow , Enticed me with a beautiful face and flawless body seductively to destruction, I did not recognize out of sheer joy and ecstasy as such. I quickly became a regular at the club, and as it turned out, I actually possessed real talent.
The same talent as my whore of a mother.
knew at once I can not remember how I was ever even a single night along without sex, the Crimson my new home, Edward, Bella, Rosalie, all the others, my family, her excited body on my own a rubbing noise equally addictive. Everyone was like fuck love and security and safety and freedom and life and happiness - only much better, more reliable, persistent, and when the probe ebbed, then not for long, only until my nÄ next visit to the Crimson
. With each other night I was to experiment, was more willing asked for more. When new people came and soon after frightened, eyes wide in panic, fled, and never look back left, I could only shake our heads and think what kind of idiots but they, and how much they missed
voluntary.
After six weeks I was not, as usual, the wide staircase led down into the basement, but up by a double door in a huge room. I knew what was meant, and thought I had incredible luck. Fortunately, because he would accept
personally, in my, the tip of the Crimson , the tone,
Carlisle Cullen
.
a shit pitch, as has been found.
"Stand still," his voice rang out behind me, and I did not hesitate so to obey him. Absolute obedience is the first rule you learn in
Crimson Shadow
. If you want to keep, keep to it. Carlisle threw an arm around my waist and pulled me with a single, firm tug roughly on his hard, muscular body. "It's new moon," he whispered in my ear. I did not care, had the significance of this seemingly senseless words, I was amazed at the sound of his voice, silk, velvet, die in music. Everyone in
Crimson uniform, magnificent features and is almost perfectly . They are all young and have no blemishes. Their appearance, their movements, their voices, even their fragrance, nothing as dangerous perfection. Like angels, but fallen, the black wings, their souls torn and bleeding.
And Carlisle is the most beautiful, angelic Next among them.
the deadly.
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